Not because they aren't totally sexually available/jumping on anything
that moves but because it's difficult to keep a conversation going
long enough to make it back to his place without wanting to call his
mother and insist that she put him back in school. (Kind of a mood
killer, unless you're into that).

I admit I'm not the most educated person (when I heard Georgia was
invaded by Russia I called my friend in Atlanta to make sure she's OK)
and I realize I'm being offesive by perpetuating the "Male Models Are
Dumb" stereotype, (I know there are exceptions, blah blah blah), but I
feel experienced enough in the subject to be allowed to criticize it
(like how you can talk shit about your own family members but other
people can't?).

Anyway.

Here are some tips on how to get through that awkward time right after
your [embarrassing] pickup line and before your walk of shame.

1) Ask Questions
Unfortunately you can't always talk about yourself. Drill your boy
with questions to prevent him from staying on a single topic for more
than a few minutes (and keep yourself from falling asleep).

Ask him if he watched the Royal Wedding (did he like Kate's dress?),
what his favorite candy is, (kids love sweets), and what time his
casting is in the morning.

2) Find Distractions
The best way to deal with dullness is by doing something fun (duh)!
Take him to a drag show or the movies or anyplace your friends will be
so you can talk to them [ignore him] while holding his hand under the
table.

3) Be Realistic
Don't expect much. (Remember that even the good ones are leaving).
This way when he does say something interesting ("I don't remember
Kate's dress, I was too distracted by how sad it is that we still have
"Royalty" in today's society") you won't ask him to marry you.